


Cinco de Mayo! Or, France comes to collect on a debt, and gets handed his a**!

by rev_lady_mal



Category: Axis Powers Hetalia, Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Battle of Puebla, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-20
Updated: 2016-02-20
Packaged: 2018-05-22 06:56:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 516
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6069574
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rev_lady_mal/pseuds/rev_lady_mal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The first fanfic I wrote. It's terrible.  Battle of Puebla Hetalia style.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cinco de Mayo! Or, France comes to collect on a debt, and gets handed his a**!

“You’re leaving me here alone?!” France shouted at England and Spain, “How could you do this to me?!”

“¡Dios mio!” Spain laughed, “they are _campesinos_ with machetes and pitchforks! You outnumber them two to one easily!”

France glanced over at England, who with Spain was also preparing to depart Veracruz. “We’ve reached an amicable agreement with the government here, and my boss is anxious for us to remain as officially neutral with the situation in America as possible, you know how she is with keeping up appearances.” England’s grin grew wider, “Besides, even you couldn’t bloody well lose against a few peasants with ancient muskets.”

France glared angrily at England’s smug face and Spain still chuckling under his breath. The three of them had arrived in Veracruz to collect on debts owed them by the Mexican government. After the war with America, the former Spanish colony was bankrupt. America was getting far too big for his britches lately, plus he seemed to be suffering from fits of madness, arguing with himself over whether each state had sovereign rights or if he was a unified country. England and France both saw a chance to knock the young country down a few pegs and try to keep him in line, especially in his current state of confusion. England had sent troops to Canada months before to put the heat on America to the north, but didn’t feel the need to help France pressure the young country on his southern border. Spain had only left Mexico a few decades before, and other than collect on money owed, his boss wasn’t interested in much past the activities she engaged within her bedchamber.

“Sacre Bleu!” France swore, “Fine then, I will handle this rabble myself!” And he began marching his troops to the capital city. England and Spain watched as France headed west into the Mexican countryside. “A hundred quid he gets his ass kicked.” England remarked blandly.

Spain threw his head back and laughed, pounding England on the back. “No one is stupid enough to take that bet! Let’s get out of here before it gets ugly!”

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

France dully looked over the bloody field covered with the corpses of his men and horses. In the distance he could hear the shouts and cheers of the Mexican peasants as they brandished their machetes and ancient rifles at the decimated French army. So far the French had suffered nearly five hundred dead, and the cavalry was completely destroyed. The Mexican peasants had lost less than a hundred, and they knew nothing of proper battle tactics, resorting to guerrilla warfare against the better equipped and trained French troops.

France’s boss would not be happy with the outcome at all, and he would insist they come back again in the future to press the issue with the Mexicans paying back their debt to France, as well as do what they could to try and weaken America; it was just a matter of time. France began moving his battle-weary army back to the ships waiting in Veracruz, and back to his boss waiting at home.


End file.
